** DISCLAIMER: Not sure if anyone will actually read this BUT if anyone does, hopefully me opening up and getting deep will resonate with someone out there struggling to find themselves.
8 years ago I was in a dark place, the darkest place I have ever been. I was a young women in my early 20s learning about myself and my body. I had never felt 100% comfortable with myself in my own skin and always wanted to look like someone else. I am sure I'm not the only women whos felt that before.
When I was starting a new chapter in my early 20s I had gone through a very traumatic event. And I say this not for pity, but for people to fully understand why fitness and being strong is important to me.
If you think I'm on here to get your pity then I will go ahead and laugh with you.
I was assaulted and told no one for some time. On top of all of the childhood trauma I faced, in this time of my life I wasn't strong enough to face the emotional roller coaster that came with it.
I was always scared and always felt like I was weaker than everyone in every aspect. The dark place lasted a little while and I isolated my self until I couldn't bear to feel bad for myself anymore.
I began going to the gym every day after work to do what I knew best at the time, running.
I started to feel better focusing my energy on positive activities. One day I was looking down at the weight room and saw body builders looking in the mirror posing. I envied their dedication and courage to put themselves out there open for judgment.
What I envied the most was people in the weight room feeling in control of their bodies.
That's what I lacked for so long and I wanted it. I hired a coach. I knew nothing about lifting and fueling my body, but everyday I grew a hunger to become physically stronger and stronger and eventually it turned into me feeling mentally and emotionally strong. I did something for myself, I channeled my insecurities I had with my body image and challenged myself to change my perception of myself.
After that day anytime I don't feel in control of my life or feel like I need an outlet my go to is always lifting/working out. Yeah some people may say that I sound like a meathead but fitness saved my life. I didn't want to be a victim to my traumas so I wasn't. Being fit doesn't just mean physically. The day I made a change in my life to exercise is when I made the commitment to constantly strive to be mentally, physically, and emotionally fit.
My why is simply to be a strong women in whatever life throws at me. I am in a place in my life that I want to help people conquer their battles with their health, body image and self worth through the power of health and fitness.
The beauty of this blogging thing is, it gives me the opportunity to be 100% my authentic self. I was hesitant to put myself out there for the world to judge me, but I mostly wanted to show some one out there struggling with the same issues I faced that you are not alone.
DO NOT give up.
FIND WHAT FUELS YOUR FIRE AND GET AFTER IT.
You are only as strong as you want to be.
HERES WHAT FUELS MY FIRE.... WHATS Yours?